Thanks for the reality check, M!

In no way did my time between July 23rd and Sept 25 feel like reality. I was truly living it up. Drinking, eating, sleeping in, living in Egypt without an ounce of stress. It was as though I was floating through some perfect universe where my only reminder of reality was the fact that my intestines did not love Egyptian food.

Then I arrived in M and BAM! Like a smack on the rear, life begins once again. After a delightful 6 hour flight, I arrived in Casablanca around 11 pm with my 60 kilos of luggage (I know it was 60 kilos because the lovely EgyptAir man made me put all of my checked and carryon baggage onto the scale at one time- thanks to him for letting me keep it all despite being way over the luggage allowance!). Mohamed was waiting for me at the airport (Yay!) and we were able to take the last train into Casa and hop in a taxi to stay with a friend for the night.

I was exhausted and landed to receive the great news of- I have no apartment and no place to go on Sunday. Super! Sunday we took the train up to the capital and sensing my irritation with the situation, Mohamed scrambled to find accommodations. For four days I stayed in a studio apartment where I killed at least three cockroaches on a daily basis. Now, I wouldn't call myself a girlie girl, but I do not do cockroaches and I could not wait to get out of there.

Back in Agdal

On a walk into the city

First time back in the Medina

I spent the four days searching for an apartment, meeting bosses and fellow teachers from school and trying to prepare for my first real teaching job while living out of a suitcase. Many of you know how well I do when not completely unpacked and living in a fully decorated place- it is not pretty! Needless to say I was feeling the stress and when my now roommate Michaela found a beautiful two bedroom, two bathroom place a minute's walk from work. We jumped all over it and moved in three days before the start of classes.

Shots of the new apartment- sparsely furnished

The day before I started teaching I met with my director and got my class schedule. We are guaranteed a minimum of 21 hours per week in our contract. When I was hired, I was told 22-23 hours was pretty typical. Apparently people are super excited about learning english this semester because I have a whopping 25 hours of teaching time. Now, those of you full timers are probably thinking that sounds pretty cushy and believe me, at first I thought the same thing. However, as a new teacher, I don't know what the heck I'm doing and I therefore have to spend loads of time preparing. For example, I spent 7 hours this past Monday (one of my days off) preparing for my 6 hours of classes on Tuesday. Ugh.

The good news is we're now into week two and it's already feeling easier. As with most things, I think the learning curve is just quite steep and you just have to work your rear end off to keep yourself from drowning the first week. And thankfully, I like it! I have a fairly varied class/age load which is nice.

I teach university students in Sale business English on Tuesday afternoons, then head back to AMIDEAST to teach adult beginners and then a TOEFL test preparation course. On Wednesdays I have two (two hour) sessions of 7-10 year olds and I get to do lots of games and coloring with them. Thursdays bring my beginner adults and TOEFL class again, then I have Friday off. Saturday is another long day with with another 2 classes of 7-10 year olds followed by a 3 hour TOEFL test prep session. Sundays are a bit like PC in that I teach teenagers on scholarship who couldn't normally afford classes. While this is a population I prefer to be with, having them for 4 hours is a bit much. Mondays are off.

So for right now, my life generally involves hanging out in my minimally furnished apartment (usually in bed) then heading off to work for preparation or classes. I haven't had much time for anything else and it's been raining cats and dogs for the last 4 days. On days off, I usually go spend some time with Mohamed in his store; otherwise, I don't see him until he closes up and we make a late dinner. For now, there's no other big news there. Just spending time and taking it easy.

Mohamed with his niece Oumayma on a visit to his sister's house in Sale.

Life here has certainly begun.

The Whole Story - Part 3

The End?

As the end of my service approached, I had to plan my next move. Mohamed and I didn't talk about my departure much, but there was an understanding that I was leaving and he was staying. Due to immigration and visa policies, there were only two options if I wanted to pursue the relationship. I could stay, or I could bring him back to the States on a fiance visa. With a fiance visa, we'd have to get married within three months of entering the states.

Mohamed's first time bowling, one of our last excursions

At 24 and pretty close to broke, I didn't feel in a position to get married and support someone else. I had no real experience and didn't know how long it was going to take to get a job. The thought of bringing Mohamed home with me was way too overwhelming to consider and frankly, I didn't want to get married! I also didn't want to stay. As much as I loved that country, I had been gone for two years and was excited to go home, see family and friends and try to make a new life.

So we spent a few last days together in the capital and said our goodbyes. It was possibly the hardest thing I've ever done, but at that time I knew it was the right move. I left.

Back in the states, I did my best to re-adapt. I got a job, found an apartment, dated. For the past two years I've lived a good life, but Mohamed was never far from my thoughts. I never quite new what to say when we'd talk on the phone and he'd say he missed me. I missed him too and I'd tell him that, but we'd just end up in the same spot during the next call.

Then, a few months ago I was at dinner with a friend here in Madison and we started talking about relationships. A comment she made during that dinner got me thinking about what I was doing with my life. Why had I left him? My original reasons no longer held true, so what was keeping me from going back?

The longer I thought about going back and pursuing our relationship, the more my mood lifted and the more it seemed like the right thing to do. So after a few months of pondering and running the potential scenarios through my mind, I called Mohamed and asked if he wanted me to come back. He did!

So, now I go back to see where things lead. I'm happy to report that things are working very much in my favor and as the pieces come together, I can't help but feel more and more strongly that I'm headed in the right direction. I haven't been this confident that i'm making the right move since I left two and half years ago!

As for the logistics, I leave from Detroit on August 20th for Alexandria, Egypt where I'll attend a certification program for Teaching English as a Second Language (TESL). Then, with my certificate in hand, it's off to the capital where I begin working as an English teacher on September 27th. It's a pretty good gig and I look forward to enjoying the country on a bit more than my PC stipend. I'll even have breaks long enough to travel!

My home starting September 25

I hope to keep this blog a bit more active this second time around, so be sure to look for updates. I also really appreciate everyone's comments and encouragement, so be sure to keep them coming!

The Whole Story - Part 2 of 3

The Middle

Soon after the party, Mohamed went back to the capital (a 14 hour bus ride away) and I officially moved into my own apartment. Life on my own was great and having Mohamed made it even better. In an odd way, being long distance was the perfect scenario.

hanging out in the capital

With PC headquarters also in the capital, I had to go there for medical visits, training sessions and other random activities. These events were all opportunities for me to see Mohamed and when I was there he was my tour guide. We spent days walking the city. It was freeing to be in a place where I didn’t know anyone and didn’t have to worry about people seeing us together. We could hold hands and go to cafes. We visited all of the main attractions and explored all of the places tourists would never go. I had an insider view of the city and loved every second of it.

Seeing the sights

When we weren’t out and about in the city, we were at Mohamed’s hanut (general store). When he was 11 years old, his family sent him to the capital in search of better opportunities. His uncles had a few stores and he moved in with them to learn the business. Soon after I met him, he opened a store on his own (he now has two!). His brother worked with him, but hours in the hanut business are long. He generally works from 7 am to 11 pm and is sometimes lucky enough to get a nap in the afternoon. When I was in town, I’d bring a book or my journal and occasionally reorganize snack cakes. The best part of life in the hanut was all of the delicious food that Mohamed would make for me. He’s an outstanding cook- even with just one pan and a tiny gas stove. I was spoiled.

Me in Mohamed's newest hanut

Since his family lived near my town, he also had a perfectly legitimate excuse to visit a few times per year. Being so sporadic, the sneaking around was minimal and we managed to be together without anyone in town finding out. I lived on the opposite side of town from my host family and the friends I hung out with, so there was never a chance of an unexpected visitor. I also lived in a building with three apartments, so as long as we didn’t go in or out of the building together, no one in town suspected a thing. It was almost as though the stars were perfectly aligned in our favor.
Mohamed hanging out with my host family

Hiking near my town

Being linked by my host family, I was even able to visit Mohamed’s village and meet his family on a few occasions. He has a great family. His mom, Khadija manages the household in the village while his dad works for a major tea producer in Casa- he spent most of his time away only returning for visits a few times per year. He also has three sisters- Fatima and Rkia (older) and Naima (younger). When I met them, all three were single living with their mother in the village, but two are now married and have small children. His two brothers are both younger and work with Mohamed in his stores.

Mohamed's youngest sister Naima at her wedding

When we weren’t together, we spent our time texting. Sometimes 30 messages in a day, but they were significantly cheaper than making calls. A text based relationship seems odd, but even so he was able to help me with my language skills and it never seemed like he was very far away. Knowing he was there got me through many difficult times and I’m not sure that I would have survived the full two years without Mohamed.

Thanks for everyone’s patience—Part three will be out soon!